my life in flux

by Matt MooneyMay 13, 2010

a tedious day's work
Creative Commons License photo credit: shaggyshoo

flux: continuous change

Ginny & I are on the precipice of heading into a new season of life.  Coming out of law school, I started working two jobs:  one was with the church where we attend (Mosaic) & the other was a consulting position with a friend and man for whom I have great respect.

Sometime around the end of August my role with the church will be coming to an end.  I am thrilled to say that I am leaving the church position with more excitement for our church than when I began.  I came in the door saying that I was happy to help- though I wasn’t sure I could- and that I did not think it was a long-term or career move for me; rather, it seemed that I was supposed to be there, and I couldn’t explain why.  And although I do believe that the reason I came on staff has become clear to me- I am leaving reciting the same lines.  I walked in a little fearful that the shine would wear off of the church we had come to love once I got a look at the “underbelly”; well, it turns out, it was even shinier under there.  I will miss working alongside that crew.

With that said, the rapid-fire follow up question begs for an answer:  what will you be doing? Well, I have a direction more than a clear answer.  There are three buckets that I intend to pursue, but I am quick to admit that these may not comprise the entirety.  I will continue in the consulting role- which is entrepreneurial in nature.  I will also be working on a writing project, as well as attempting to figure out what the future of 99 Balloons Inc. entails; I am pretty sure that the organization is begging for more of something, but I am not sure it is me.

And if none of those manage to feed my family, I will be looking for a fourth bucket.

I give you this exhaustive back-story to say this:  I am excited about the state where my life is.  Intrigued by the questions that will demand and get answers- because, when you jump, you land somewhere; albeit it’s often your face.

Sure there are some seriously daunting questions that must be answered i.e. health insurance, house payments, etc.  And I’m not hinting that I don’t sometimes wake up at odd hours and wonder if I am inching toward epic failure, and momentarily feel as if I cannot breath because of the heaviness and responsibility of my family- that pet sitting on my shoulders like the blessed albatross that I am thrilled to carry.

But on my better days, I really do think I am not settling- that I am doing the hard work of finding a place in this world where I can have a unique impact.  And even as I write that, I know it sounds like pie-in-the-sky drivel that accurately typifies the naivety inherent in an entire generation.

This place that we are entering is not new to us, and yet it is never comfortable.  In fact, many folks spend their entire lives avoiding the space I currently occupy.  But, for now, I feel the anticipation of clicking my seatbelt before the roller coaster ride begins, knowing there will soon be times ahead that I wished I had never taken my seat.

If God has taught us anything along the ride we’ve been on, it’s that the best things in life are not found in the safety nets but in walking the wire.

8 Comments

  1. Joy on May 13, 2010 at 4:06 pm

    Great last sentence. I feel that in the depths of my soul right now. It’s scary and exhilirating all at the same time. I don’t think I would want it any other way. Thanks for sharing!

  2. Robert on May 13, 2010 at 4:08 pm

    I was reminded the other day by my mentor that “the Will of God will never send you where the Grace of God cannot keep you.” Best wishes for you and yours as you seek His will!

  3. Joy on May 13, 2010 at 5:15 pm

    I’d like to add that when I say “I don’t think I would want it any other way”, I really mean that in the end, that’s the decision I come to. But the process comes with a lot of doubt, fear, etc. You know 🙂

  4. Joe Keys, Sr on May 14, 2010 at 10:45 am

    I am amazed with you young man. I regret that I did not get closer to you and know you better when you were at FSC.
    Obviously you weren’t typical, but in my ignorance I didn’t see you for who you really were.
    I love listening to you.

    God will bless I’m convinced,

    Joe

  5. martha newman on May 14, 2010 at 2:14 pm

    based on this and many posts i feel the writing endeavor will be at least enjoyed by me:) -not that that will ‘bring home the bacon’ but you do have a gift with words matt mooney….and as always, i hope/know that your absence on ‘staff’ won’t bring absence in our lives because our mooney time is our favorite time. thanks for setting the pace.
    -marth

  6. Cary on May 14, 2010 at 3:33 pm

    I think you’ll be awesome at whatever you do. You are annoying like that. I’ll be praying for the Mooneys during this transition time.
    When did you learn to play the violin?

  7. Julie on May 17, 2010 at 9:05 am

    Wow – that last sentence really got me. That is a quote I’m going to hold on to. While different circumstances, that really spoke to me. And as a mother who has felt the pain of child loss, you are so right about what God has taught us on this journey. I’m at a point in my life, too, where I am looking at a next step and it’s scary. It’s scary when the weight of the family is on your shoulders and you want to be sure they are provided for, etc.

    Thinking of you…in more ways than one!! And know you will do great whereever you land!!

  8. Jen in AL on August 3, 2010 at 10:03 am

    wow, been awhile since i checked in on you guys. What a blessing to find you still seeking hard after the Lord and welcoming God’s new blessing of Anders! He is just so precious! Congratulations! Hazel is absolutely adorable! your children ,ALL 3, are beautiful. Never tire of seeing Eliot’s sweet face. Blesses me down to my toes. I am actually a little ashamed that I forgot his birthday. please forgive…

    His impact goes on for the glory of God. I am so thankful to have the privilege of knowing a small part of your story, God’s story of your life. I pray someday our families will meet in person. huge hugs for your whole family and continued prayers as you live “outside the box”. Love your last line of the this post: If God has taught us anything along the ride we’ve been on, it’s that the best things in life are not found in the safety nets but in walking the wire.

    holding onto Christ, walking the wire, trying to keep my eyes open, Jen in al

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a tedious day's work
Creative Commons License photo credit: shaggyshoo

flux: continuous change

Ginny & I are on the precipice of heading into a new season of life.  Coming out of law school, I started working two jobs:  one was with the church where we attend (Mosaic) & the other was a consulting position with a friend and man for whom I have great respect.

Sometime around the end of August my role with the church will be coming to an end.  I am thrilled to say that I am leaving the church position with more excitement for our church than when I began.  I came in the door saying that I was happy to help- though I wasn’t sure I could- and that I did not think it was a long-term or career move for me; rather, it seemed that I was supposed to be there, and I couldn’t explain why.  And although I do believe that the reason I came on staff has become clear to me- I am leaving reciting the same lines.  I walked in a little fearful that the shine would wear off of the church we had come to love once I got a look at the “underbelly”; well, it turns out, it was even shinier under there.  I will miss working alongside that crew.

With that said, the rapid-fire follow up question begs for an answer:  what will you be doing? Well, I have a direction more than a clear answer.  There are three buckets that I intend to pursue, but I am quick to admit that these may not comprise the entirety.  I will continue in the consulting role- which is entrepreneurial in nature.  I will also be working on a writing project, as well as attempting to figure out what the future of 99 Balloons Inc. entails; I am pretty sure that the organization is begging for more of something, but I am not sure it is me.

And if none of those manage to feed my family, I will be looking for a fourth bucket.

I give you this exhaustive back-story to say this:  I am excited about the state where my life is.  Intrigued by the questions that will demand and get answers- because, when you jump, you land somewhere; albeit it’s often your face.

Sure there are some seriously daunting questions that must be answered i.e. health insurance, house payments, etc.  And I’m not hinting that I don’t sometimes wake up at odd hours and wonder if I am inching toward epic failure, and momentarily feel as if I cannot breath because of the heaviness and responsibility of my family- that pet sitting on my shoulders like the blessed albatross that I am thrilled to carry.

But on my better days, I really do think I am not settling- that I am doing the hard work of finding a place in this world where I can have a unique impact.  And even as I write that, I know it sounds like pie-in-the-sky drivel that accurately typifies the naivety inherent in an entire generation.

This place that we are entering is not new to us, and yet it is never comfortable.  In fact, many folks spend their entire lives avoiding the space I currently occupy.  But, for now, I feel the anticipation of clicking my seatbelt before the roller coaster ride begins, knowing there will soon be times ahead that I wished I had never taken my seat.

If God has taught us anything along the ride we’ve been on, it’s that the best things in life are not found in the safety nets but in walking the wire.

8 Comments

  1. Joy on May 13, 2010 at 4:06 pm

    Great last sentence. I feel that in the depths of my soul right now. It’s scary and exhilirating all at the same time. I don’t think I would want it any other way. Thanks for sharing!

  2. Robert on May 13, 2010 at 4:08 pm

    I was reminded the other day by my mentor that “the Will of God will never send you where the Grace of God cannot keep you.” Best wishes for you and yours as you seek His will!

  3. Joy on May 13, 2010 at 5:15 pm

    I’d like to add that when I say “I don’t think I would want it any other way”, I really mean that in the end, that’s the decision I come to. But the process comes with a lot of doubt, fear, etc. You know 🙂

  4. Joe Keys, Sr on May 14, 2010 at 10:45 am

    I am amazed with you young man. I regret that I did not get closer to you and know you better when you were at FSC.
    Obviously you weren’t typical, but in my ignorance I didn’t see you for who you really were.
    I love listening to you.

    God will bless I’m convinced,

    Joe

  5. martha newman on May 14, 2010 at 2:14 pm

    based on this and many posts i feel the writing endeavor will be at least enjoyed by me:) -not that that will ‘bring home the bacon’ but you do have a gift with words matt mooney….and as always, i hope/know that your absence on ‘staff’ won’t bring absence in our lives because our mooney time is our favorite time. thanks for setting the pace.
    -marth

  6. Cary on May 14, 2010 at 3:33 pm

    I think you’ll be awesome at whatever you do. You are annoying like that. I’ll be praying for the Mooneys during this transition time.
    When did you learn to play the violin?

  7. Julie on May 17, 2010 at 9:05 am

    Wow – that last sentence really got me. That is a quote I’m going to hold on to. While different circumstances, that really spoke to me. And as a mother who has felt the pain of child loss, you are so right about what God has taught us on this journey. I’m at a point in my life, too, where I am looking at a next step and it’s scary. It’s scary when the weight of the family is on your shoulders and you want to be sure they are provided for, etc.

    Thinking of you…in more ways than one!! And know you will do great whereever you land!!

  8. Jen in AL on August 3, 2010 at 10:03 am

    wow, been awhile since i checked in on you guys. What a blessing to find you still seeking hard after the Lord and welcoming God’s new blessing of Anders! He is just so precious! Congratulations! Hazel is absolutely adorable! your children ,ALL 3, are beautiful. Never tire of seeing Eliot’s sweet face. Blesses me down to my toes. I am actually a little ashamed that I forgot his birthday. please forgive…

    His impact goes on for the glory of God. I am so thankful to have the privilege of knowing a small part of your story, God’s story of your life. I pray someday our families will meet in person. huge hugs for your whole family and continued prayers as you live “outside the box”. Love your last line of the this post: If God has taught us anything along the ride we’ve been on, it’s that the best things in life are not found in the safety nets but in walking the wire.

    holding onto Christ, walking the wire, trying to keep my eyes open, Jen in al

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