photo credit: SimplyAbbey
Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.
Proverbs 13:1
I don’t wait well. Admittedly, my first instinct is to cleverly shuffle off the blame for my propensity- on America or manhood or the ole standby, parents. But I don’t think I would have it in me to wait well if I were Indian, Jewish or Asian- with breasts or without.
And let me welcome everyone to the summer of waiting. The one whereby, my dear blog readers, you must be gluttons for punishment. Cause you came back and there’s nothing to report. And it’s hot and I’m tired. Sick of wondering. Tired of trying not to think of what her day was like today; the house is not finished (who cares). There is no word on the adoption front. And I have not matured to the point of patience, and I know it and it might as well be on display for you all to bookmark as a reference note on how we, as believers, are not to act.
As bad as I am at waiting, I am worse at pretending. I know that God has led us here, and I know he is faithful- or at least I know that last line is what I am supposed to say, recite and hope in. And I do, I really do.
And I cannot decide if my anger truly stems from a lack of faith which would be unjustified and something I need to allow the Lord to work on in me. Or if I am just ever-loving ticked off at the injustice I encounter in this world. A feeling that would be justified, of God and hopefully cultivated rather than eliminated.
I do not believe that those called by God are supposed to lean on shovels and pray for holes. We are to gird up for battle, knowing the outcome is beyond us as our sweat and blood pour over the ground of injustice.
It’s just not right. Twenty-six families who have been approved for adoption, wait on Ukraine to publish a list of what is “special needs”. This is the list that allows for adoption before five years of age. By every possible definition, Lena meets it. It’s not the content we await- just the actual creation of the definition. So, special needs children- whom families have chosen to bring into their homes- wait on some department of something to do their job. Once again, the world we occupy has pushed special needs children to the margins. And no amount of faith is going to make this okay with me- nor should it.
a prayer for a day like today:
Lord, save us from trouble, but help us to be people who get in the way of injustice and trouble the waters of oppression. Thank you for whispering to us that we are beloved. Help us now to whisper your love to those who long to hear that there is a loving God. Amen.
-taken from Common Prayer
2,423 Comments
photo credit: SimplyAbbey
Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.
Proverbs 13:1
I don’t wait well. Admittedly, my first instinct is to cleverly shuffle off the blame for my propensity- on America or manhood or the ole standby, parents. But I don’t think I would have it in me to wait well if I were Indian, Jewish or Asian- with breasts or without.
And let me welcome everyone to the summer of waiting. The one whereby, my dear blog readers, you must be gluttons for punishment. Cause you came back and there’s nothing to report. And it’s hot and I’m tired. Sick of wondering. Tired of trying not to think of what her day was like today; the house is not finished (who cares). There is no word on the adoption front. And I have not matured to the point of patience, and I know it and it might as well be on display for you all to bookmark as a reference note on how we, as believers, are not to act.
As bad as I am at waiting, I am worse at pretending. I know that God has led us here, and I know he is faithful- or at least I know that last line is what I am supposed to say, recite and hope in. And I do, I really do.
And I cannot decide if my anger truly stems from a lack of faith which would be unjustified and something I need to allow the Lord to work on in me. Or if I am just ever-loving ticked off at the injustice I encounter in this world. A feeling that would be justified, of God and hopefully cultivated rather than eliminated.
I do not believe that those called by God are supposed to lean on shovels and pray for holes. We are to gird up for battle, knowing the outcome is beyond us as our sweat and blood pour over the ground of injustice.
It’s just not right. Twenty-six families who have been approved for adoption, wait on Ukraine to publish a list of what is “special needs”. This is the list that allows for adoption before five years of age. By every possible definition, Lena meets it. It’s not the content we await- just the actual creation of the definition. So, special needs children- whom families have chosen to bring into their homes- wait on some department of something to do their job. Once again, the world we occupy has pushed special needs children to the margins. And no amount of faith is going to make this okay with me- nor should it.
a prayer for a day like today:
Lord, save us from trouble, but help us to be people who get in the way of injustice and trouble the waters of oppression. Thank you for whispering to us that we are beloved. Help us now to whisper your love to those who long to hear that there is a loving God. Amen.
-taken from Common Prayer
2,423 Comments
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on July 28, 2011 at 3:35 pm
So sorry to hear this. Know that we are waiting and praying along with you for this process to move forward. Hate it for Lena and other children with special needs who are waiting, too. It doesn’t seem fair! Hoping to hear better news, soon.
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on July 28, 2011 at 5:52 pm
thanks for the update, feel like I’ve been behind! Praying hard for you guys and Lena as you walk through this. And Matt, she’s a blessed little girl to HAVE A DAD that feels pain and anger and frustration…all because you LOVE HER SO MUCH! Keep on fighting, if you aren’t fighting for her, who is? Hang in there!
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on July 28, 2011 at 9:29 pm
Praying for you as you wait, that you will experience the Peace that passes understanding. Remember, God’s timing is always perfect. I’m anxious to hear your good news when HIS timing comes!!
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on July 29, 2011 at 2:24 am
Fell onto your blog because Jennie Allen just started following me on Twitter and she made a reference to you.
As an adoptive dad of a slavic son, I’m personally vested in seeing your story through to the end. I’ll be following.
Hi.
(I also happen to be 25% Ukrainian.)
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on July 29, 2011 at 6:11 am
Dear Matt,
I pray for you, Ginny and especially for Lena that burocracy will publish the definition soon.
I hope you find a way to enjoy the summer with Anders and Hazel, anyway.
Big Hug
Christine
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on August 2, 2011 at 6:37 am
Great photo !! God works in mysterious ways.
So sorry to hear this. Know that we are waiting and praying along with you for this process to move forward. Hate it for Lena and other children with special needs who are waiting, too. It doesn’t seem fair! Hoping to hear better news, soon.
thanks for the update, feel like I’ve been behind! Praying hard for you guys and Lena as you walk through this. And Matt, she’s a blessed little girl to HAVE A DAD that feels pain and anger and frustration…all because you LOVE HER SO MUCH! Keep on fighting, if you aren’t fighting for her, who is? Hang in there!
Praying for you as you wait, that you will experience the Peace that passes understanding. Remember, God’s timing is always perfect. I’m anxious to hear your good news when HIS timing comes!!
Fell onto your blog because Jennie Allen just started following me on Twitter and she made a reference to you.
As an adoptive dad of a slavic son, I’m personally vested in seeing your story through to the end. I’ll be following.
Hi.
(I also happen to be 25% Ukrainian.)
Dear Matt,
I pray for you, Ginny and especially for Lena that burocracy will publish the definition soon.
I hope you find a way to enjoy the summer with Anders and Hazel, anyway.
Big Hug
Christine
Great photo !! God works in mysterious ways.